No, Landon. You may not say that word!

When you live with two boys ages 13 and 8, the air is filled with crude and questionable vocabulary. I'm very careful what and how I say things, as they are always on the alert for me to slip up. Yesterday, Landon busted me.
Already on a tear for something else Gary was supposed to do and hadn't, I walked into his room and noticed an almost empty gallon of sweet tea partially under his bed. I neither buy sweet tea, nor allow food outside the kitchen. He'd had multiple friends over this weekend, so it must've traveled to our house with one of them. I demanded, "Why is there a gallon of tea in your room? Where did this come from?" I was met with three blank stares. Peering at Landon I asked, "Is it yours?" He shook his head no. I glared at Gary, "Is it yours?" He silently shook his head no. With the same angry tone I asked Austin, "Is that yours?" He continued to shake his head in unison with the other two. No one uttered a sound. I knew they were guilty, but I wasn't asking the right question. I grabbed the jug, held it up, and noticed that it was a little off color. Then I gasped, and before I could catch myself I screamed, "Is this piss????"
Their faces changed from fear to total shock followed by uncontrolled laughter. It took Landon all of 2 seconds to announce, "Mom said a bad word. I KNEW YOU SAID BAD WORDS!!! I KNEW IT I KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!!! CAN WE SAY PISS TOO????" 
Once the tension broke and laughter subsided, Austin admitted that he'd brought it over and forgotten to take it home the night before.

Look, A Bear!!!!

No, there's not really a bear, but Landon is perfecting his distraction technique.

The other day we took the boys to a birthday party. They played on a water slide for a while before we ate supper and cut the cake. Gary decided to sit out which was fine with Landon in the beginning, but he soon became bored without his #1 accomplice. Landon's game switched from playing in the water to running to mommy to tattle on the other kids. I began to watch him more closely and witnessed him pushing a little boy - the same boy he had just accused of pushing him 5 minutes earlier. He didn't know I had been watching and ran immediately to tattle again. After he finished his story I asked, "Well Landon, do you know what I just saw?" He knew immediately that I had witnessed the entire incident. His eyes grew wide. He gasped, then slowly answered "A dinosaur?"
What the heck??? I was so surprised at that answer, I was speechless and every other adult in the vicinity roared with laughter! I couldn't help but join in. Landon 1 : Mommy 0

Last night, Randy cooked steak for us. Landon loves steak and will usually eat all that he can get his hands on. This one was a cheaper grade, not our usual tender ribeye or fillet. Randy inhaled his plate before any of us finished. He was still hungry so he poured a bowl of Cheerios and sat back down to the table with us. Landon had two bites of his steak left, but saw Randy's cereal and told him he was tired of chewing and he wanted some cereal too. Randy told him no, and to finish his steak. Landon waited a few minutes, got up from the table, walked around the stove, then approached Randy. We'd all forgotten about his cereal request by then. Standing right next to Randy's chair, Landon started chatting with Randy. Once Randy was fully immersed in conversation, Landon subtly pulled a spoon from behind his back, dipped it in Randy's bowl, lifted a huge bite of Cheerios to his mouth, then dropped the spoon to his side. He was headed for his second bite when Randy realized what had just taken place right under his nose! Landon 1 : Daddy 0

I can't get no sa-tis-faction

Gary has recently started getting creative with his words. Landon complains enough for the whole family so I've pretty much shut Gary off from any negative talk about ANYTHING to try and decrease the negative influence he may have on Landon. He gets plenty from "the world". Anything added from the coolest kid on the planet just makes Landon ten times worse!

It's VBS time again. Gary hates going and always has, but he endures the pain for one week in the summer to pacify me. What an awesome kid! He knows he's not allowed to complain in Landon's presence, so just before walking into church this morning he states in the most grown up voice he can muster at 7:45 a.m. "Mom, I just want you know that I am not satisfied with this!" I grinned and politely thanked him for cooperating. We kept walking, went inside, and I checked them in. Before I turned to leave Landon exclaimed, "I hate Bible School!!!" I kissed them both and ran before they had a chance to chase me!! Hopefully they'll have a super fun day and tomorrow will be a little easier on us all.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me

Last night, Landon told me something that was entirely believable, but I knew it wasn't true.. I asked him if he was telling me a story. He said, “What’s that mean?” I told him, it’s the same thing as a lie. He said, “Oh, yea… I tell stories to my friends all the time!” I asked him what kind.

"I told them that me and my daddy and my dog have a real pirate ship. For real! And we found it under the water. They didn't believe me and I told them, 'I'm positive!' I told 'em me and my daddy and my dog are all real pirates, too. I promise! I just kept saying, 'I promise!, I'm positive, I mean it,' and now they believe me"

I was cracking up and he was too!!!! He was so proud of his “stories”. Remind you of anyone who went to school with a bandage around his head and crutches? Or anyone who might've told the school they had cancer? or a monkey heart (with a scar to prove it)?

Daddy Discipline

I'm usually (99.99%) the disciplinarian of the household and am always looking for new ideas. Randy has taken on the reigns a few times in the last couple of weeks with some very creative correcting techniques! 1. If Gary makes any C's on his report card again, he has to lose the shaggy hair and get a short haircut like Randy 2. The boys were playing in the house and Randy was working on his truck the other day for a short time will I was grocery shopping. They couldn't get along (Landon kept coming outside crying and tattling) so he made them each sit in a chair on opposite ends of the front porch until he finished what he was doing. The kicker was: it was in the 40's that day and he didn't let them go back in to dress before assigning posts. Landon was wearing a long sleeve shirt, shorts, and flip flops. Gary was wearing basketball shorts, no shirt, no shoes. I don't think they've EVER been so happy for me to get home so they could tattle on daddy for making them sit outside naked for 30 minutes and freeze to death!!! In reality, it was less than 10 minutes, but it definitely "cooled them off" :) 3. In response to the muddy cast incident below, he grounded them both from going outside until Landon's cast came off (a whole week later!). That's probably the longest they've ever gone without playing outside.
Kudos to Randy for some nifty ideas!

How do you spell trouble?

L-A-N-D-O-N-G-A-R-Y-M-U-D

I really should be proud they went almost 8 days without getting muddy. But he has another six days to wear this disgusting thing!!!

Casts aren't just for broken bones!

The story from last night goes like this... While Gary and Landon were in bed playing their Leapsters, I told Randy that Landon got in trouble for hitting a kid at school with his cast. Randy called Landon who immediately leaped around the corner wearing his favorite black glasses with the bushy eyebrows, nose, and mustache attached.
Me - Landon, tell Daddy what happened at school today.
Landon - (still in the glasses and looking so sincere) Nothing!
Randy - Did you get in trouble for hitting someone with your cast?
Landon - Oh, yea, that. (not really concerned)
Randy - Did you hit him?
Landon - Yea
Randy - Why?
Landon - Because Jace hits me all the time so hard that I almost die! So hit him really hard with my cast! But Mrs. Smith only made him apologize one time. I had to apologize 90 times because I made him cry!!! (He was ticked off about apologizing so many times, but extremely proud that he was finally able to get even..)

I hope that cast is really strong and very tight. Yesterday evening before church, I found Landon hanging on a vine with both hands - swinging like a monkey! Should he be doing that? It's actually kind of useful. 1. for fending off the enemy 2. for hanging bags on - last night, he helped me carry stuff upstairs - my angel :)

Santa's Newest Elf

This is definitely one for the record books. Last night, Randy was out doing some last minute Christmas shopping and I was home with the boys. Randy called to ask me about presents for the boys. About five minutes later, Gary grabbed my phone to play a game or text someone or something. He'd been on it all evening so I didn't think anything of it. A few minutes later, the phone rang. It was Randy again and Gary passed the phone to me. Apparently, Gary had texted his daddy, "did you get the boys enything?" from my phone! The fact that we had just talked along with the misspelled word was enough to arouse Randy's suspicion. He only replied "a little" then called me. Gary knew by the look on my face that he was busted and flashed a big toothy grin coupled with a sinister laugh. He was proud of his craftiness. I have to admit, I was too. THAT was a good idea!!!!

Spam!

Success!!! The comment moderation feature has finally paid off. Last night I had a comment from a spammer advertising a certain first-round type fertility drug. It just so happens to be the same one that I can thank for most of the Dear Diary predicaments below! Why would I ever want anymore of that? hehehe Obviously, I'm kidding. I'd take 10 more Landons if that's what God blessed me with :) Back to the topic at hand; it was sort of empowering to be able to reject the comment before it was ever published. Hooray for publishing control!

A Star is Born

Yesterday, Princeton Elementary Celebrated Veteran's Day with a ceremony to honor all of our Veterans. Click Here for the video link showing news footage from the morning activities and Gary's 10 seconds of fame! But, the real stars are Jim and all the others who've fought for and are currently fighting to save our freedom. Thank you Veterans!!!!

Dear Diary,

The past week has been so bizaar, I've decided to document it before I forget..
Monday, Nov. 2 Landon had a bike wreck (no one saw what happened). Went to the E.R. and received 6 stitches under his chin.
Tuesday, Nov. 3 - Back on the bike
Wednesday, Nov. 4 - Landon was caught by my mom, just before riding his bike down the slide!
Thursday, Nov. 5 - Landon's school called about 11:00 a.m. to tell me that he had fallen off the slide and torn his frenulum (the piece of skin that attaches your upper lip to your gum) Again, no one witnessed the accident. He's told us, 1. He was sliding down the slide on his bottom and just fell off the side, 2. He walked into the slide, 3. He was pushing a lawn mower and ran into the slide, 4. He was pushing a lawn mower up the slide. We will probably never know how this one happened!
Friday was quiet
Saturday, Nov. 7 - I removed Landon's stitches and he fell asleep half way through the process
Sunday, Nov. 8 - Landon fell on his face and reinjured his lip
Monday, Nov. 9 - Landon fell on his face, again, and reinjured his lip
Tuesday, nothing note worthy
Wednesday, Nov. 10 - Cathy Turner called from Princeton to tell me that Gary had been bitten during P.E....by a 4th grade girl!!! Apparently, a group of girls was playing vampire and decided he was a worthy victim...
What's next?!
**Update I just talked to Gary on the phone to get the vampire story. In addition to a bite, he also was cut in the eye by another kid's paper, and fell on his own pencil. Teacher is looking for lead in his hand as I type.
I won't make the mistake of asking, "What's next?" again! hahaha

Gary's Sunday School Lesson from 08-30-09

Zoom in on the bottom right corner...Might we have a comedian emerging?

If he's serious, he's grounded for a year!!! :-)

By the time his "work" got to the other end of our pew, every one of us was giggling!

School Daze

Both the kids are finally in school and things are getting back to normal (whatever that is!). Homework..football practice (also known as "the grass game" to Landon)..cool mornings. I'm not sure who's happier, our babysitter or me! :)

Gary's first day

"You really expect me to smile and be happy when you're making me ride the cheese wagon this year!?"

Landon's first day and his birthday!!!! He couldn't be more excited about school. Snack person, new chucks with fire on the side, cupcakes, drink boxes in his backpack. When mom picked him up today, he wanted to stay at school! He called me after they left, "Mom, I didn't cry. I was the leader all day. I did everything my teacher said to do." I told him he was the best kid in class. He cut me off with "I know." He's most impressed with PreK-4. We'll hope for the same attitude tomorrow morning.

More to come...gimme time

Greenfield Picnic Day 2009

Greenfield's Annual End of the Year Picnic was today at the park on Brownlee Road. Landon and the rest of the kids had a wonderful time. Below, is Landon's first attempt at jumping off the climbing rocks (reserved for 5 years old and up) You have to click on the picture to really appreciate it. His face tells the whole story!

His class having lunch.

There was a rhino, a horse, and a race car. Landon passed on the first two and waited for a turn on the car. Imagine that!


Running for the next water spout

He became more brave with each jump. This was about #5.

He landed with a thud. Lay motionless. I ran over thinking, "Great, I've let the kid break his back!" (The other moms were trying to keep their kids off the rocks) "Landon, are you okay?"

"Dat one hurt just a wittle," he said in a calm steady voice without looking up or moving a muscle. "Jus wet me way here a minute."

"Okay, I'm ready to do it again!'

Taking a break to warm up with Mrs. Candy.

Back to the grindstone

One last jump before time to leave. If I had to guess, he probably did this 50 times. All that practice jumping off the stage at church finally paid off!

Field Day 2009

Start the morning off with a friendly game of tug-of-WAR

A few of them lost their grip and fell flat on their faces.

Of course Gary didn't miss out on that action! (green hat)

Mom's still cheering them on

50 yard dash
1st (Gregory)
Austin and Gary tied for 2nd

This had to be the most fun event of the day..
Drag Racing - Haughton Style!!!

PUUUUULLLLLL!!!!

KEEP PULLING!!!!!!!!

The parents HAD to get in on this one!

Mrs. Waldron was a good sport. Hard work paid off. Gary's team won this one too :)

"Jump back Jack"

Take a step back each time you catch the ball. Bow out if you drop it. Gary and his partner were among the last "men" standing :)

Finally...a break...

Good morning "love"

You know you live with boys when first thing in the morning...
Me: "Good morning, Sunshine!"
Gary: "I just peed and the bubbles made a heart shape in the toilet!"

Catch Up

We've been super-busy doing "things" and I haven't had a chance to post in a while. Here's a quick catch-up of our past couple of months...

Gary took a sewing class at church.
They made dolls and hospital gowns, then delivered them to kids at Sutton Children's Hospital.

Mardi Gras parade at Greenfield

The kids (neighbors included) can't resist our ditch.

L-R: Gracie, Gary, Colton, Landon, Bailey, Grant

ages 3-13

Basketball or Ballet?

Showing his skilz

Easter Egg Hunt at 1st BC Haughton

Patriotic program for Easter with Master Mixer GW on the Mic

Monroe Zoo

No matter how loud Landon and Bailey growled at those lions, they wouldn't make a sound!

We found a few monkeys at the zoo too :)

Are YOU smarter than a 3rd grader?

Congratulations to Platt's six third graders that competed in the Shreveport Symphony's Music Memory Competition at South Highland's Elementary last night. Winning 2nd place was no easy task for them! They studied 10 classical music selections, had to memorize the song and correctly write the Symphony or Piece it came from, the song title, and the composer after listening to a small section of the song, sometimes less than one measure. For the record, I studied with Gary for a month and I could only indentify two last night!!! They received points for correct answers, spelling, and punctuation...example:
Symphony No. 35 in D Major ("Haffner") First Movement
Allegro con spirito
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Washing Post March
John Philip Sousa
Rodeo: Hoedown
Aaron Copland
"Night on Bare Mountain"
Modest Mussorgsky

I probably punctuated those wrong! But you get the gist... The kids were awesome and had a great time. Thanks to Mrs. Watters, their music teacher. She worked hard to keep them interested and teach all those songs; even staying after school to work with the kids. They're lucky to have her! If you see Gary Wilson, Jayson Nitz, Grace Teutsch, Alana Lewis, Chloe Lewis, or Mackenzie Farqhar make sure to high-five them. They definitely deserve it!

Coupon Queen

A lady on FoxNews this week, inspired me to start using coupons. She WAS blogging her $1500/year challenge, but had negative feedback from some less than impressed folks (probably CNN watching democrats!) so she deleted her blog. Regardless, following her for a couple of days was enough to get me excited about saving money. I printed a lot of coupons online, clipped from the Sunday paper, and took advantage of Brookshire's Moonlight Madness sale yesterday. My total savings were about $40 off what would have been a $98 shopping trip! That's exciting!!! I don't have time to recount the entire event, but can't skip bragging about: $.35 box of bandaids-used Brookshires paper's $1.00 off any health/beauty item to discount a $1.35 box of bandaids; and two cans of Del Monte corn - $.99 reg. price minus a $.75 coupon for each left me with two cans of corn @ $.24/ea.; lastly I had a $.30 coupon for Downy liquid fabric softener that qualified for tripling. I usually pay around $6 for it at the dollar store but Brookshire's a certain scent (Violets and Roses) on clearance for $3.34. Subtract $.90 for the tripled coupon and I walked away with a $6 bottle of downy for $2.44!!! I didn't get anything for "free", but I have to leave something for next time's goal. Happy shopping and happy coupon clipping! Please leave any hints you may have as I'm new to this game :)